Alright, now that we have a bigger audience here on Twetch …

“Hey, I’ve got a great new joke for you!” the barman says.

The NSA smiles. “Heard it.”

Best joke for little kids:

You: "Knock knock"
Kid: "Who's there?"
You: "Impatient cow."
Kid: "Impatient cow wh.."
You:"MMMOOOOOOO!!"

They may not understand why it's funny, but trust me - you'll both be rolling.

How did the mental patient escape through the woods?

He took the psychopath

What did the seal with the broken back tell the polar bear?

"Do not consume when seal is broken"

Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field!

They say never to talk about sex, politics, or religion with certain company.

With that in mind, I rarely start a conversation without asking, "What is your opinion on gay marriage?"

What's green and has wheels?

Grass. (I lied about the wheels.)

Shortest joke I know ... ready ? BTC

a rabbi, a pastor, and an imam walk into a bar.

bartender takes one look at them and says "what is this some kinda joke!?"

What’s a fish day when it hits a concrete wall?

Dam